Last updated on January 6th, 2024 at 05:23 am
The new Normal: Mid-month! A Kenyan guide on how to survive this unavoidable hardship.
Alternatives! These are what characterize a typical mid-month situesh. One is forced to look away from extravagance because well, its mid-month and the gauge is almost hitting the E for extremely broke.
Gone are the days when Kenyans hustle around it and pull an act to seem as though all is well. These days, there has been an openness of frankly saying, ‘maze nikunoma, stamake’. People have continued to embrace the fact that they need to explain nothing about what they are going through. No sugar coating, just the plain truth! I am broke guys. Hence this basically means time out from the Kawaida splurge one would normally indulge in. So what does the new normal look like??
Skuma wiki, ugali: Cutting costs and looking for great discounts, because what choice do you have!
Food is a basic commodity consumed daily and finding a way around it can see one cut costs to almost zero. Ladies and gents, please help me introduce Skuma wiki and ugali, a favorite at that time of the month.
This combo is a cheaper, waay cheaper alternative. Its components? One large onion, Skuma wiki, which goes for what, twenty shillings and a tomato. If feeling fancy, one can throw in an egg or two On a Sunday, as a treat or better yet, an avocado totaling up to less than a dollar.
And just like that, one of the basic costs are cut to virtually nonexistent lol because come on, a dollar?? Yaani less than 100 bob No, less!
The plug? Mama Mboga. Ever heard of angels amongst men? Definitely fit the description. These mamas will wash, cut and even give you a perfect concoction. Managu, terere or spinach Skuma wiki, or terere, managu, Skuma wiki and terere. And if you are lucky your mama mboga can be a rapper, like this one.
Plus, nowadays there are many food outlets aka vibandas where one can spend as low as fifty shillings. For this, one can get chapatti and beans commonly referred to as, chapo
madodo, chapatti ndegu and one of the favorites, chapatti surwa, which basically is diced up chapatti mixed with soup. How much? Twenty shillings ONLY!
This may sound a bit extreme, but that is a matter of opinion, however, jumia Kenya do have amazing discounts on groceries. Take for example unga ya jogoo going for 84 KSh amongst many other groceries at amazing discounts.
Take advantage of these discounts so as to survive mid-month like a boss. Not only that, delivery is done for free saving you that time you take to go to the shop or supermarket through Jumia express.
Transport: Matatu hack that you need to know
Bus fare can see one spend almost two hundred a day in Nairobi. This is with prices going ridiculously high especially during rush hours. I’m talking eighty shillings ridiculous. So to beat this, many decide to spend an extra hour or two in the office.
This way, they are the bus stop by eight or eight thirty. What this means is lesser traffic, bus fare which goes to as low as fifty and finally lesser hustle. Ever seen those horrendous queues?? Most of them clear out by then.
A bonus would go to one who works in organization where extra hours can see you off work in the weekend. Look at that?? How many birds are those?? Four with only an extra hour or two in the office? Easy peasy!
Electricity: KPLC tokens and the mid-month games
This is another one! Tokens go fast like this (snaps fingers). It’s insane! Two hundred gets you, I don’t know ,thirty something units which if you have a hot shower, fridge, are a staunch KOT member, unwind over episodes of Bobs Burgers re runs, Facebook is bae and on top of that, have to pump water after every three days! For sure, ultimately, one is doomed to a never ending beeping sound indicating the low count in your meter.
Smart men and women who are looking to save their coins get the work done in the office. Phones are fully charged and an episode of Black list, Greys anatomy and Bob’s burgers is already watched before leaving the office. Anything to salvage a hot shower especially in the brutal cold of the early morning.
Money Matters: Why is money in such a hurry to finish the month before you?
Say you are washing your clothes in the middle of the month because getting a mama fua is a luxury that you can no longer afford. Then, the stars align and the greatest miracle happens, you reach into the pockets of your pants and a crumpled up 1000 Bob note is discovered.
First, you are overwhelmed with emotion and tears of joy almost stream down your face. Second, you bust out into a celebratory dance akin to the traditional dances we used to pull off at a music festival back in the day. For midmonth, you are in another tax bracket altogether. Mayai na noodles one side, in comes a kaquater of mbuzi, with ugali and kachumbari.
It begs the question, where does this money go to? And why is it in a hurry to finish the month before you! One wonders. However, if you are not fortunate enough to angukia a kanote in your pockets when doing laundry, there are a couple of ways you can okolea yourself.
If you have exhausted your nisaidia na thao nitakurudishie nikilipwa resources, here is what you can do to get that push till end month. One way is by taking mpesa based loans like mshwari loan or KCB mpesa. This ones are straight forward and do not require you to install any app.
But remember, hii si pesa ya bure and you will be required to repay the full amount with interest. So use this money wisely.
Shopping: What happened to all the shopping that was to last for a month?
The ideal situation would be hii mafuta itakaa hadi end month and sininui sukari ingine hadi next month. So why is the sugar bowl being used as a cup for tea to dissolve the remaining grams of sugar and blueband becoming a suitable alternative to cooking oil?
Well, most of us have been in this scenario one too many times and you can’t quite explain why the monthly shopping lasted two weeks!
Luckily for us, you can get crazy deals when you shop online. From groceries to household items and even gifts for those events that sneak up on you. Be sure to be checking out jumia kenya’s deals of the day.
Hapo it’s very hard ukose kuangukia something. With discounts everyday of up to 60%, how much of a lifesaver would this be?
When thrown at lemons, make that lemonade rain!
That’s it. Hacking the mid-month crisis, Kenyan style!
Feel free to comment below. We would really love to hear your thoughts on the article you just read or your struggle with mid-month.